You had no idea what was coming your way. You stayed in the boat of comfort with abundance of opportunities out in front of you, just waiting for your grasp. Voices were calling you to “walk out of the boat” and to “obey.” It was easier to justify for yourself that something else would be a better suit for you, but you had no clue.
Court, you were afraid and did not see your potential. You had an agenda of your own. Your fists were closed to what was really ahead, yet you stayed, safe, inside of your reality that you built for yourself. You desperately wanted and continue to be an expert but dear court, you are not. You assumed you knew what was best, but boy did you have a surprise coming.
You woke up one morning in November, convicted. Court, you were convicted that the trajectory that you set up for yourself was not really what you were called to do. Instead, you were being pushed and called for something that made no sense to you. You prayed, you bawled, you called people- but in your heart-of-hearts, you knew exactly what was needed of you.
Court, you had to step out of the boat of comfort that you made for yourself and step out in obedience. You needed to deny yourself along with your comforts, your desires, your agenda to pick up your cross.
The drive you took seemed like an eternity. On your way, you played your music to mask the anxious thoughts. But little did you know, the Lord was creating a dialogue with you.
“You are full of life now, you are full of passion, it is how He made you, just let it happen. He called each one of us by name, to come away and He whispers to your heart, to let it go and be a light.”
“I lean not on my own understanding, my life is in the hands of the maker of Heaven. I give it all to your God, trusting that you will make something beautiful out of me.”
Beautiful conviction and peace overcame you as you pulled up behind the house. You did not know what was ahead but the Lord was stirring, fearlessly, inside of your soul.
You walked into meeting that Monday night, not sure what was ahead and left that meeting with a weight of emotions. Your name was on the screen. Your heart ended up in your throat somehow. An overwhelming amount of emotions overcame your body.
It was an adjustment, but time and time again, you were reminded of truth. You were rallied behind and celebrated. Courtney Kiolbassa did a spoken word that night and you watched her and realized that she was one of the many women you get to be proud of. This is who you get to serve.
That night you called each of the new members on exec, scared and hoping that their phone would go straight to voicemail. You were insecure of your ability or worth to even be in this position. But Court, look at the gospel. The individuals that the Lord called were not equipped. In that time, the Lord has shaped and and given you what you needed.
The thing that was at first uncomfortable and foreign is now something that is comfortable and known to you. Your grasp is timid to let this season go because it treated you well. You were challenged, you were pursued, you were loved. But more so, you were able to serve and love and find your place.
Oh Court, it was such an honor to serve the wonderful women of Xi Kappa. Court, do you know the privilege and the magnitude of the women that you got to encounter with? Here, you were able to see growth in these women. As a whole, you saw a body working together. Each member had a crucial part to play. Right before your eyes, you got to witness accomplishments, sorrow, humor, revelation, vulnerability.
You were challenged. Not by the position instead particularly but the people around you.
Court, take a moment to remember your journey and what your God has done for you and who He has made you. Though your time is coming to an end, you are not done yet. You are just beginning. Now Court, you get to be the biggest cheerleader like Lizzy was for you. You get to be available, love well and speak truth and identity into the next president. You get to be slow to speak and quick to listen.
So dear Court, look back and sing of the Lord’s praises. You are not the woman you are today without this experience with Chi Omega and the women that fill it. This season is not your peak but one of many to come. Just you wait.